‘Right, Fabien, I’m not having this conversation.’

A bald chap with a backpack and casual business attire had just boarded my busy train at Waterloo. He was talking loudly into his phone and was somewhat vexed.

‘If he asks me if I’ve spoken to Fabien, I’m gonna say no.’

I obviously couldn’t hear what Fabien had to say for himself, but the man felt he had some explaining to do.

‘Look, he told me to cc her and so I did. There was nothing I could do.’ 

He was clearly struggling to make his point.

‘I understand you, Fabien, but you don’t understand me. I told you: Matthew is uncontactable and Ainsley is panicking. All I’m asking you to do is not lie.’

There was a good deal of repetition and exclamation. And the conversation finished unsatisfactorily.

‘I’m gonna stop there, Fabien. You’re still not getting it.’

The man hung up and slumped back in his seat.

‘F**k!’

 An uneasy atmosphere lingered in the train carriage. 

The brief altercation had embraced deception, indiscretion, inconsistency and anger. I found myself wondering whether the events that prompted the dispute had merited all this emotion. 

'Anybody can become angry - that is easy. But to be angry with the right person and to the right degree and at the right time and for the right purpose, and in the right way - that is not within everybody's power and is not easy.’
Aristotle

Sometimes in the world of work, we let people get under our skin, we get hot under the collar. I once kicked a bin over because a package had not been delivered. I regretted it immediately, realising that only a rare few look good when they’re annoyed - Marlon Brando, Joe Pesci, Jack Nicholson, for example. When I kicked that bin I came across more like Norman Wisdom.

We ought to take our jobs seriously. It’s only by doing so that we can extract any satisfaction from them. But we should be aware that intense concentration and a narrow focus can result in a disproportionate response to setbacks. The blood pressure rises and the red mist descends. We can’t help getting irritated and indignant.

'The greatest remedy for anger is delay.'
Thomas Paine

It’s always best to take a breath and count to 10. The issue at hand probably doesn’t matter that much. And if it does matter, then it deserves a considered, calculated reply. We should ‘try to be cool about it.’

Perhaps that’s what the irate bald man should have said to Fabien.

'I'm trying to be cool about it,
Feeling like an absolute fool about it.
Wishing you were kind enough to be cruel about it,
Telling myself I can always do without it,
Knowin' that it probably isn't true.’

boygenius, ‘Cool About It’ (J Baker / L Dacus / P Simon / P Bridgers)

No. 421